Home

We started talking
again today. I was doodling,
I do that now, and Miss You
came on. I stopped,
looked up, and felt this need,
this sudden compulsion,
to see you. Right then.
It couldn’t wait.
It had to be right then.
So stood up, grabbed my cell,
stuffed it in my pocket,
and went to the hall.
“Mom, I am going for
a walk. Everything’s fine,
I just need air”. Then I left,
walking out the garage door
like I have so many times,
to go see you. It was cold;
I only had on my jacket,
and the stars over head
were brilliant, the clear night
perfect for some drunken walks
if it wasn’t so cold. I thought
of the time I made this same walk
in January, with sandals and a t-shirt,
no coat, no socks, no nothing.
Tears streaming down my face,
freezing and only making
me feel even less human.
But it wasn’t like that this time.
I didn’t need your comfort,
only desired it. I texted you,
r u home?
But by the time that I
reached your house there was no reply.
So I called, you answered,
Can I come over?
By this time I had already
passed your house,
was down by the crazy guy’s driveway.
But I turned around,
headed back, seeing the beckon
of your porch light.
I let myself in, got a slightly
odd look from your mom,
but it was normal
for me to come over at 8,
uninvited, unannounced.
I headed up the stars,
to your door plastered with
magazine clippings. The squirrel
was still there. A push
and I was home,
the sent coming welcomed,
and you laying on the bed.
A white t-shirt, dark pants,
the TV on, of course.
“I just started Borat”
I smiled, it was such a you movie,
and sat down. I was home,
it was like nothing ever happened.
No drugs, no anger, no love,
nothing.
I was home.